You know its been a long time since you’ve blogged if your blog automatically gives you a tutorial on how to start writing a post. So this is how I’m starting my Thursday.
Well actually, my Thursday started with yet another trip to the auto shop for my vintage minivan and its mysterious noise that no one can figure out. And since we moved since last I posted, I now have a few coffee shop options within walking distance so here I sit, as though I actually fit in with the hipsters, all 39 years of me.
I took Julia to the climbing gym last night, which normally is Luke’s glorious job but when the man has to work I fill in. I looked around and made mental note that I’m pretty sure I was the oldest person in the whole place, which makes me feel all sorts of weird. It’s the same feeling I got like 10 years ago when I realized all pro ball players and movie stars were younger than me. It’s like the world turned upside down or something.
You may want to know where we moved…well, we moved closer to the kids school into this great little community, it’s actually a little city within our larger city, complete with it’s own city hall and police department and what have you, which just so happens to be like two blocks from my house. This came in handy not too long ago when I noticed a suspicious character in our alley and the police arrived in TWO WHOLE MINUTES.
Anyway, our “new” house actually was built as a church in 1920, and I’m not even kidding. It’s funny and rather ironic because while our actual church has been looking for a building to worship in for years (as we’ve grown out of our hotel accommodations), we ended up moving our family into a church building, go figure. It’s only been a residence for one other woman who converted the then dance studio into an actual home. It comes complete with a sanctuary, aka our living room, and double doors with a castle-like knocker that will startle the pants off you and basically scares our dog every single time someone uses it.
I really don’t know what I’m doing writing in this space again. Who’s to really say why I quit writing. Could it be that mothering just kicked into full gear? Teenagers? A wild dog that needs grooming once a month? I honestly have no idea. Except for the fact that I tend to overthink everything to such an extreme that sometimes it seems the only option is to avoid the thing I’m overthinking. If that even makes sense.
I will say that there did come a point where I realized I needed to be more mentally available for the life that’s happening around me. I needed to not feel conflicted about the time it takes to write and the things I was giving up to do it. And probably, much to the surprise of all introverts out there, I was getting lonely in my little writing corner in the back of the house.
Yesterday though, I had lunch with an old friend, and by old I’m not trying to put down her age (she is much older than me), but I’ve literally known her since I was maybe 12, and what used to be a “mom of my friend” type relationship has transitioned sweetly over the years into more of a “peer” friendship and affection. I would probably put her in the category of mentor except I know she would hate even the title of that, she just doesn’t realize how much she teaches me through her life, words, and testimony. But one thing she sweetly spoke into my life as I was mentioning that sometimes lately I’ve felt a little bored being a stay at home mom, at least while my kids are at school and while they seem to all have lives of their own these days. Anyway, she was like “well, you could write again.” And I acknowledged that perhaps there was something to those words. Especially since I still pay for this blog because I’m so un-savvy that I can’t figure out how to stop paying for it!
And really, I have no idea if God is prompting words again. There’s so much going on in our life, so much change, lots of new people, new friends, current events worth talking about, ideas to hash out, that maybe it’s time again to dust off this old lap top, try to pull it away from the kids writing papers on it, and maybe type out a few words God is laying on my heart these days.
If anything, it may just give me a break from wiping off the counters and folding laundry. We shall see.